Pyongyang, May 25 (KCNA) -- General Secretary Kim Jong Il enjoyed an art performance given by soldiers of the Kamnamu (persimmon tree) company of the KPA honored with the title of the thrice three-revolution red flag together with servicepersons of the KPA.Yeah, that's how my PR guys wrote it up. Let me give you my version:
The soldiers of the company known to the whole country as a symbol of Kim Jong Il's loving care for the soldiers put on the stage chorus "Our General Is the Best", story-telling and song "General and Our Kamnamu Company", quartet and chorus "May Soldiers' Song of Happiness Reverberate Far and Wide", poem and song "The Blue Sky over My Country", instrumental music and song "Our Days as Soldiers", solo and chorus "Who Ever Taught Me?", chorus and dance "Song of Coastal Artillery Women", chorus "Footstep" and other colorful numbers of various genres.
I Would Totally Fuck All These Bitches
by KIM JONG-IL
I didn't have very great hopes when I came out to this event. I know the lead singer: a cute, saucy female officer who I'd seen on parade long ago, determining that I would bone her, if I had the chance. And one other little cadet I know. A full-figured tart who was brought out of the sticks to work undercover security when we had the Burmese foreign minister in Pyongyang (Pig-fuckers are still pissed off about '83), and who's been on duty at my weekend palace ever since. But then as I look about the table at this after-party, it dawns on me that none of the assembled women here are beastly, and that given the opportunity, I would totally fuck all these bitches.