Showing posts with label Mariska Hargitay fakes celebrities Thackeray nudes breasts tits topless Olivia Benson search keywords John Maynard Keynes. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Mariska Hargitay fakes celebrities Thackeray nudes breasts tits topless Olivia Benson search keywords John Maynard Keynes. Show all posts

Saturday, February 21, 2009

One Half a Day of Doink-Doinks

You've probably heard the Law & Order sound at least twice in your life. If you heard it only once, it got cut off for some reason. You have not heard it properly and must try again.

The Law & Order sound is the strangely reverbed clanking thingy that accompanies black title screens on episodes of Law & Order and Law & Order: Special Victims Unit that indicate a sudden scene change. E.g.:

McCarren Residence
4132 Some Place in New York
[Time — optional]
*Law & Order Sound*

According to IMDB, the noise was created by mashing together about a dozen different sounds, one of which featured a bunch of monks stamping on a floor. This is by far the most interesting fact about the sound, but of course, since it's IMDB, you're never going to find even slightly more explanation than that. For years, fans online referred to the sound as the chung-chung, until the USA network started running promos featuring some of the cast. In them, Dann Florek, who plays Captain Donald Cragen (appearing in the first three seasons of the original show and in every season of SVU), referred to the sound as the doink-doink, and the name's pretty much stuck.

Law & Order is on nearly 24 hours per day, and while it isn't the greatest show by any means, it usually can be relied upon to not suck. Thus it worms its way into fans' lives: the show that's always running as a marathon somewhere, sometime, the show that can always be put on in the background while you iron some clothes, dust, make dinner, tinker with something. In this way, you wind up hearing a lot of doink-doinks. I couldn't sleep one night because my mind simply wouldn't shut down, and I found myself watching — you guessed it — Law & Order reruns because every other option involved trying to sell me something extremely absorbent or a twiggish blonde woman walking through a world filmed in blue and seeing dead people and then putting them to rest by asking inane questions of living people who she'd meet and then magically see them as their past selves. So I started to wonder, how many times have I heard that doink noise during my life?

Wednesday, December 3, 2008

Search String of the Day for 12/3/08

Some poor, engorged, aching soul went looking for
and was unfortunately directed to my carping about the slow degradation in quality suffered by Law & Order: Special Victims Unit. I can't tell you what a thrill it is to tap into this reader market. This is almost as exciting as when I got the pageload on November 27 for someone searching for, "law and order mariska forced oral sex" and the November 13 search for "unwilling throat pounding videos" that amazingly directed someone to my review of Requiem for a Dream.

I don't really understand what's happening here. I mean, I get it that Mariska Hargitay is an attractive woman. I can get having sexual fantasies about her. What I don't get is wanting to skip her entirely and get right to her character having sex and, worst of all, her character getting raped.

If you want to think of ol' Mariska nude and in your bed, great. If you want to get off thinking about someone who is not even you, someone who is a fictional character, having brutally dehumanizing non-consensual sex with her — well, yer fucked, pal.