Japan Pledges To Halt Production Of Weirdo Porn That Makes People Puke
"We honestly had no idea people did not enjoy this stuff," said Cultural Affairs Minister Kazuhiro Nakai, expressing regret for the thousands of hours of bondage porn, rape porn, utensil-rape porn, food-rape porn, frozen-food-rape porn, vomit-enema porn, elder-care-coma-patient-rape porn, and the kind of a porn in which a nubile youth is kidnapped, stripped, tied down in a wading pool and raped. "We are deeply ashamed for whatever it is about these films that has made people around the world vomit so vigorously. Please know that the content was only intended to entertain and arouse."
Thursday, February 12, 2009
Despite having mined virtually every possible topic for humor and having wrung out all the easiest jokes already, it's nice to know that The Onion can still periodically bring it and deliver an article that stays consistently funny after the headline and the lede.