Friday, March 25, 2011

Twitter Ephemera: Hipster Sitcoms

Ever since receiving critical tweet acclaim on THE Huffington Post, I've been thinking about legacy and impact — the kind of twitcorpus I can leave to my children and yours. (And, if I can get really famous, perhaps the last two will be one and the same.)

In the meatspace, this has meant an investment in more than a few new ascots, as well as those fancy drinking glasses that kind of look like small fishbowls but with stems. You know you've hit the bigtime when you're only lifting soda to your face underhanded.

When it comes to saving things online, though, Twitter does kind of a bad job. It's difficult to navigate friends' feeds to find something more than a few weeks old, especially if you can't remember the wording closely enough to perform a search. Older tweets become unavailable, seemingly arbitrarily, past a certain number or time span. Cached Google searches rarely return anything useful.

Unless you know the exact link to a tweet from a year or two ago, chances are you will never see it again. Twitter claims that all back-content still exists and that a partnership with Google will make all archives searchable, but for such a wildly successful website, it's bizarre that they simply can't show you enormous amounts of the basic text that accounts for their sole purpose for being.

Of course, most Twitter content is pretty terrible and forgettable, and I know that applies to much of mine and my friends' as well. But every now and again, as with National Novel Writing Month Opening Lines, a bunch of people get together and riff on a few jokes that might be worth a second glance and a laugh some time later. The origins of both Shark Hitler — the world's most deadly animal, put inside a shark — and my strange obsession with Stevie Nicks' abuse of monoglot hispanic au pairs are now lost to time. I can't let that happen to such an important sociological document as "Hipster Sitcoms."

Because I am a lazy person, I didn't have the volition to go back and copy any more jokes from other people, but below you can find a list of silly jokes from me (with a few assists from my friend Robert). Also, because he's a funny guy, and because he wrote so damn many of them, I included a bunch from partner in twitcrime, Woodmuffin, who usually outclasses everybody when it comes to finding these trending topics jokes and going off on a spree.

Hipster Sitcoms
PBR: You Getting Served

11:40 PM Jan 28th via TweetDeck


Saved by the Belle and Sebastian

11:41 PM Jan 28th via TweetDeck


The Descendents of Clarissa Explain All

11:43 PM Jan 28th via TweetDeck


Everybody Loves Ray Davies

11:44 PM Jan 28th via TweetDeck


The Stone Roseannes

11:44 PM Jan 28th via TweetDeck


Cloves, American Style

11:44 PM Jan 28th via TweetDeck


Studio 54, Where Are You?

11:46 PM Jan 28th via TweetDeck


Welcome Back, Kottke

11:48 PM Jan 28th via TweetDeck


Golden Girl-Talk

11:49 PM Jan 28th via TweetDeck


3rd Rock from the Sunny Day Real Estate

11:49 PM Jan 28th via TweetDeck


Radiohead of the Class

11:54 PM Jan 28th via TweetDeck


Becker

11:55 PM Jan 28th via TweetDeck


Everybody Loves Ramen

11:59 PM Jan 28th via TweetDeck


Loft in Space

11:59 PM Jan 28th via TweetDeck


FourSquare Pegs

12:00 AM Jan 29th via TweetDeck


The Courtship of Eddie's Dealer

12:01 AM Jan 29th via TweetDeck


Doogie Howser, MFA

12:02 AM Jan 29th via TweetDeck


Capitol Twitters

January 29, 2011 12:04:20 AM EST via TweetDeck


Hangin' with Mr. Cooper (Because He's "Authentic")

January 29, 2011 12:06:23 AM EST via TweetDeck


Joanie Likes Chachi's Facebook Status

January 29, 2011 12:07:16 AM EST via TweetDeck


The Merry Thurston Moore Show

January 29, 2011 12:09:53 AM EST via TweetDeck


The Kids into Hall and Oates

January 29, 2011 12:12:04 AM EST via TweetDeck


Andy Kaufman Controls the Universe

January 29, 2011 12:14:30 AM EST via TweetDeck


Withdrawn Together

January 29, 2011 12:18:01 AM EST via TweetDeck


According to Jim Jarmusch

January 29, 2011 12:22:55 AM EST via TweetDeck


Murphy Brownstone

January 29, 2011 12:26:28 AM EST via TweetDeck


Deathcab for Latka Gravas

January 29, 2011 12:28:06 AM EST via TweetDeck


Interpolice Squad!

January 29, 2011 12:32:11 AM EST via TweetDeck


The Walkmen of a Certain Age

January 29, 2011 12:32:36 AM EST via TweetDeck


Wilco and Grace

January 29, 2011 12:33:11 AM EST via TweetDeck


Parker Posey Can't Lose

January 29, 2011 12:36:39 AM EST via TweetDeck


Get a Lifestream

January 29, 2011 12:39:02 AM EST via TweetDeck


Parklife and Recreation

January 29, 2011 12:47:49 AM EST via TweetDeck


Vicar in a 227

January 29, 2011 12:54:43 AM EST via TweetDeck


The Cassingle Guy

January 29, 2011 12:56:44 AM EST via TweetDeck



From Woodmuffin:

Dubstep By Step

January 28, 2011 11:37:49 PM EST via web


BRfect Strangers

January 28, 2011 11:38:16 PM EST via web


Mr. Velvet Undergroundere

January 28, 2011 11:39:15 PM EST via web


Jenny Lewis Can't Lose

January 28, 2011 11:41:18 PM EST via web


Diff'rent Smokes

January 28, 2011 11:42:45 PM EST via web


Alt-y Towers

January 28, 2011 11:46:14 PM EST via web


Rhoda Fixed-Gear The Whole Way Here

January 28, 2011 11:47:10 PM EST via web


The Greatest Bohemian Hero

January 28, 2011 11:48:15 PM EST via web


Chapel Hill Street Blues #okaysoitsnotasitcombigwhoop

January 28, 2011 11:49:47 PM EST via web


Eight Tambourinists Is Enough

January 28, 2011 11:55:21 PM EST via web


Blog House

January 28, 2011 11:56:54 PM EST via web


Andy Warhol Controls The Universe

January 28, 2011 11:58:02 PM EST via web


Scarf 54, Where Are You?

January 28, 2011 11:58:41 PM EST via web


Buried... In Children's Clothes

January 29, 2011 12:01:22 AM EST via web


Father Knows Brecht

January 29, 2011 12:02:55 AM EST via web


Dead Like Me, Jay Reatard

January 29, 2011 12:07:39 AM EST via web


33 1/3 Men

January 29, 2011 12:10:25 AM EST via web


Viviolden Girls, starring PBRthur

January 29, 2011 12:14:05 AM EST via web


The Adventures of Tweet and Tweet

January 29, 2011 12:18:09 AM EST via web


Trish Keenan and Kel

January 29, 2011 12:19:30 AM EST via web


Stereolabsolutely Fabulous

January 29, 2011 12:20:07 AM EST via web


Two and a Half Minutemen

January 29, 2011 12:20:36 AM EST via web


Malkmus In the Middle

January 29, 2011 12:28:22 AM EST via web


Sex and the City Paper

January 29, 2011 12:29:58 AM EST via web


Welcome Back Goddard

January 29, 2011 12:30:30 AM EST via web


Pitchfork and Mindy

January 29, 2011 12:42:21 AM EST via web


Beat's Happening?

January 29, 2011 12:43:19 AM EST via web


Are You Being Gentrified?

January 29, 2011 12:52:36 AM EST via web


Suddenly Sufjan

January 29, 2011 12:53:54 AM EST via web


I Love Loko

January 29, 2011 1:30:53 AM EST via web


6 comments:

  1. I would love to watch Andy Kaufman Controls The Universe.

    ReplyDelete
  2. this is really bad. sorry

    ReplyDelete
  3. rip, jay reatard

    ReplyDelete

Et tu, Mr. Destructo? is a politics, sports and media blog whose purpose is to tell jokes or be really right about things. All of us have real jobs and don't need the hassle that telling jokes here might occasion, which is why some contributors find it more tasteful to pretend to be dead mass murderers.